Saturday, December 27, 2008

Banner Ad Review: I Think I'm Done Here

As you may know, I have sort of a thing for making fun of banner ads, and for pointing out stupidity. Don't get me wrong, now. A lot of my friends are Christian, and most of them are good people, but let's face it: there's not a lot of demographics dumber than the true fundamentalists, and as you'll soon see, there's not a lot of demographics that make dumber banner ads either.

What's with the broken infinity symbol? Why did they use the image of White Jesus twice, and cut the second one off halfway? Why did they replace the "o" in network with a cross, instead of the actually vaguely cross-shaped "t"? How do you think God feels about you using the image of the device used to torture and kill thousands of people including His son as the symbol of your religion? Why did this banner ad appear on the message board for my DnD group?

But of course, I couldn't stop with mocking the ad, mostly since I just used up all my material in that last paragraph. I had to check this "christian NETW+RK" out for myself. In addition to such thrilling topics of conversation as "Canada," "Christian tattoos," and "team jesus in me" there's a noted denial of proven facts, such as the December 25th date being borrowed from pagans. Ah, hell, just look at it yourself.

Of course, that just led me to the best part, and the point of this post: The Fundamental Top 500, a (very real) web ring for fundamentalist Christian sites that...well, that seems to use as its logo none other than the image of an angry man halfway through delivering a vicious beating, probably of an atheist or homosexual.

Agnostics, atheists, secularists, we're now officially done. There's no way we can top that.

Annotation From The Future:

Unsurprisingly, the christian NETW+RK no longer exists. The url "" is now the home page for the Slovakian branch of Tiffany's Jewelry. Because that makes sense.

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